5 Senses for Success: Strategies to Thrive in Any Arena

By Juli Geske-Peer

You don't have to be perfect to find success!

In 5 Senses for Success: Strategies to Thrive in Any Arena, Juli Geske-Peer shares her expertise in leadership, coaching, and conflict mediation to deliver unique approaches for achieving your personalized version of success. Through the 5 Senses, you will learn to:

• Language: English
• Publisher: Juli Geske-Peer
• Release date: May 28, 2024
• ISBN: 9798990587816

Book preview

1st edition

Written by Juli Geske-Peer

Published by Kirk House Publishers, Burnsville, Minnesota

5 Senses for Success:  Strategies to Thrive in Any Arena

© Copyright 2021 Juli Geske-Peer

All rights reserved.  No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Printed in the United States of America

First printing, May 2021

First edition

First Printing 2021

Print ISBN: 978-1-952976-13-1

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021904906

Cover Design & Interior Book Design: Kirk House Publishers

Reprint 2024

Paperback ISBN:  978-8-9905878-0-9

eBook ISBN:  979-8-9905878-1-6

This book is dedicated to my family—of origin and of    selection—who have taught me the lessons

I hold dear today.

Failures can be painful, but the lessons affix that much better for the pain. Successes are joyous, treasured, and aimed for repetition.

I love and appreciate you all.

Introduction

The 5 Senses for Success was years in the making. Decades, even. This book draws from my experiences in professional and personal settings, books and articles I have studied, and the certifications and degrees I have amassed. Through my reading and research, my triumphs and failures, I developed certain skillsets and ways of thinking that bolstered my professional life and my personal well-being. These methods and concepts—some of which took many years (and some pain!) to learn and practice—have been critical to my success, and I am certain they will benefit others as well. Lessons and practical approaches in 5 Senses for Success have the potential to positively impact personal and professional success.

As an avid researcher, voracious reader, and committed lifelong learner, this book has been partially informed by my studies. Much of my career has been spent gathering and reporting business intelligence for organizations, and I’ve used those skills to support my work here. To bring my research to life, I include a personal story in each chapter. (As a content advisory, please note that some of these stories involve assault or abuse.) All names have been changed to protect and maintain the privacy of those involved.

Each chapter of 5 Senses includes a leadership section. Leadership can be (and ideally is!) demonstrated anywhere, not just in formal leadership positions. Though I refer to several leadership-based examples, the concepts discussed in these sections can be applied to any career or role.

While I am not a scientist, I have done my best to only use sources I found accurate and reliable. My writing also stems from a very specific perspective. I am a US citizen who is a white, middle-class, middle-aged, heterosexual woman. I have a spiritual nature, largely based in Christian tradition, but which also incorporates other traditions. With these factors in mind, please forgive any errors of interpretation or inclusivity I may have unintentionally made.

I finalized this book during a unique time in history that has included a worldwide pandemic (COVID-19), as well as societal unrest displayed in protests, riots, and violence stemming from a specific pain point—the murder of George Floyd and the stark reminder of long-term disadvantages experienced by people of color. With political unrest and widespread uncertainty, the concepts in this book are needed all the more. I hope you will find them useful.

Chapter One

Launch the 5 Senses

We all aim for something. We all have goals and ambitions. My goal in 5 Senses for Success is to share the factors I have found to be most critical for achieving success in any arena of life. Whether you aim for career growth, seek meaningful relationships, or aspire to reduce conflict with those around you, this book will equip you with practical tools to meet your goals. But what if you are striving for broader achievements? If you’re hoping to build trust and motivation, understand yourself and others, or find your inner strength, 5 Senses can guide and inform this broader journey as well.

For a long time, I thought the seeds of this book were planted in my early career, when I found myself involved in work that required heavy listening (focus group moderating). I’ve come to understand however, that the seeds were planted when I was a child. From an early age, I actively observed and listened to the adults around me, in order to avoid problems in a dysfunctional household. Back then, I didn’t realize what I was doing. But now that I have spent years exploring, learning, and experimenting, I have a greater understanding of the skills I employed as a youth and young adult, as well as other concepts and techniques I put to use later in life. I share these ideas with you, hoping that perhaps you will avoid some of the stumbling (faltering, staggering, toppling) I experienced along my journey.

I managed to overcome an unhealthy childhood, heal from being the victim of abuse and violence, parent successfully, build a healthy marriage, reach executive status within organizations, and launch and lead several businesses. I have worked and volunteered with diverse populations, from serving global companies and their worldwide staff, to supporting local underserved youth and incarcerated teens and adults.

My accomplishments did not happen overnight. Classes I attended and books I read provided a base of information, but my true development and growth came from practicing the skills I learned. For instance, I took numerous classes in mediation techniques and became a Qualified Neutral for the State of Minnesota. However, I did not truly understand the impact these skills could have on my life success until I observed more experienced mediators, implemented these skills in all areas of my life and, frankly, periodically failed to use the skills I’d learned.

As I twisted and turned through my personal journey, it became clear to me that success is not something a person finds only in the home or workplace. Success is not isolated to singular events or one-off relationships. Instead, success is a holistic concept—an attitude more than anything, and something attainable by every one of us.

Of course, your definition of success may differ from your coworker’s, your spouse’s, or your best friend’s definition, but that doesn’t make it any more or less real or valid. When I work with coaching clients, I help them identify and achieve their unique definition of success.

Despite differences in our individual goals and aspirations, the journey toward success boils down to a few key components—a handful of core elements that provide a healthy base on which to build our accomplishments. The following four elements are some of the most crucial:

A profound understanding of the self and others

Healthy relationships with family members, coworkers, and community members

The ability to navigate tough conversations and conflicts

The capability to truly value and accept others

Think of these four foundations like conditions to grow a garden. It doesn’t matter if your goal is to grow turnips or lettuce or petunias or raspberry bushes—you need the proper amount of water, sunlight, and nutrients for plants to prosper. With that in mind, reflect on your goals. Do you want to earn a raise? Improve communication with your children? Become a respected leader? It all starts with your roots.

My roots were not always as solid and deep as they are today. In fact, they were downright shallow. I spent a significant part of the last five decades mired in unhealthy relationships (involving abuse, divorce, and challenges in raising children), embroiled in conflict, and trapped by self-doubt and feelings of inadequacy that carried over from my youth. I’ve been stressed to the point of physical illness and have had my body rebel against me through various female issues, four cancers (thankfully all curable, early stage), migraines, and digestive complications, among other maladies. I have endured at least ten surgeries associated with my ailments, not to mention associated remedies such as radiation treatment.

Although I once had trouble seeing the purpose in all my personal and professional hardships, I now understand these hardships helped shape me. I am hopeful that by sharing how I thrived in spite of these struggles, I can alleviate pain and stress you may be experiencing, and save you precious time, as you navigate toward your own personal and professional success. After unearthing some key truths that can be applied to a wide range of people and situations, I have employed and watched these methods work with individuals of diverse cultures, races, genders, orientations, and abilities. I am confident they will work for you. For me, it all starts with the 5 Senses.

The five major senses—see, hear, touch, taste, and smell—are part of most individuals’ journeys (I recognize that some people do not fully realize all physical senses). The senses are built into our realities and determine how we experience the world around us. I’ve examined each of the five major senses and modified them into a set of FIVE NEW SENSES that represent five key attributes. By recognizing the importance of each attribute and working to develop each particular skillset, you will set yourself up for success in almost anything you endeavor in your career or personal life. The 5 Senses can also have a positive impact on your life and sense of joy. Thank you for joining me on this journey through the senses. Please experiment with the tools and methods presented in each chapter. It is in the practice that we become.

Introducing the 5 Senses

I’m a big proponent of concepts such as brass tacks, executive summary, or net message. I have worked with enough executives over the years, and written enough lengthy reports of findings, that I understand some people simply don’t have time to read everything provided (which others will work through more wholly), and they need a way to digest down the most salient points.

This 5 Senses introduction isn’t a true executive summary, but it will at least establish the concepts so that one can understand where this work is heading and what areas may be best to dive into more in-depth.

Let me introduce my concepts, and how I convert the true five senses into my new 5 Senses for Success:

As you can see, some of the conversions are easy to understand immediately (for instance, see to observe), while others may not look intuitive (smell to appreciate). The remainder of this chapter explains my rationale for how I reinterpret the original senses into my new 5 Senses. The chapters to come focus on each new sense, expand on those explanations, and provide in-depth exploration of my 5 Senses for Success.

See→Observe

Vision begins when light rays are reflected off an object and enter the eyes through the cornea. Each person sees the world (literally and metaphorically) through a unique lens and we assume that what we see is true. We make snap judgments about others based on what we see, and it takes time and practice to go beyond seeing only the surface. That’s where OBSERVING comes into play.

Unlike seeing, which is largely automatic, observing takes mental effort. It involves asking difficult questions, and peeling back the layers of whatever is in front of us, in order to see into its center. When you see a person dressed in ratty clothing or a teenage mother or a coworker who is always frowning, it’s easy to place a surface-level judgment on that person. But what if we didn’t? What if we took the time to see beyond the thick shell of the coconut, into its liquid center? Through personal experiences, I discuss the potential and limitations of sight and what it means to step beyond seeing into observing.

Hear→Listen

Hearing involves a chain reaction of tiny bones within the ear. It’s a delicate process, and a lot can be lost in translation. You might think you’re hearing what someone is saying, but are you truly LISTENING?

Listening involves much more than simply hearing. It’s an active process that goes beyond the words and takes into consideration the context of the conversation, body language, vocal inflection, the speaker’s culture and background, and a host of other factors. Through my experience as a professional conflict mediator and coach (as well as various personal experiences), I have learned several valuable techniques to maximize true listening.

This chapter gets to the heart of what it means to listen, especially in the context of conflict or difficult conversations.

Touch→Feel

Our skin is filled with nerve endings that create a sense of touch. We rely on this sense to deliver both positive (a hug, a lover’s touch, a handshake) and negative (a hot stove, a slap, a cat scratch) messages to our brain.

What lies beyond the nerve endings and chemical messages to our brains? Emotions and FEELINGS. Like touch, emotions can be a positive or negative force. Many people struggle to find a balance between too little (or suppressed) and too much (or overwhelming) emotion. A whole industry exists for combatting or coaxing emotions: anger management classes, psychiatry sessions, restorative circles, etc. We are faced with emotionally charged situations almost daily. So how do we cope with all those innate neurological reactions spinning around our brains?

This chapter asks, What do healthy emotions look like? and illustrates several instances when I had to grapple with negative feelings (my own and others’).

Taste→Engage

Taste is a multi-sensory experience. When we taste food, we also see, feel, and smell it. All those elements lead us to have an enjoyable (Yum, ice cream!) or a negative (Ew, sardines!) experience.

Similarly, we use many of our senses in ENGAGING with others. We