The Unwanted Child

By John D. Mccray

Tayvon Williams is a thirteen year old male that’s lived a hard life growing up. He finds out the truth about something that’s been hidden from him his entire life. Tayvon decides that his life is worth more than what people gave him credit for and he’s out to prove everyone wrong, in spite of all the obstacles he has to face.

Tayvon meets Ms. Lena Hardin, a thirty-six year old cafeteria worker that has a great influence on his life. They take a strong interest in each other’s lives and realize that they have endured the same kind of hurt and pain growing up. There’s a reason why God has put these two in each other’s lives because they will end up needing each other more than they realized.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Apr 30, 2024
• ISBN: 9798369421147

Book preview

Copyright © 2024 by John D. McCray.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to any actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Getty Images.

Rev. date: 04/30/2024

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Contents

Dedication

Chapter 1 Tayvon Williams

Chapter 2 Selena Hardin

Chapter 3 Tayvon

Chapter 4 Lena

Chapter 5 Tayvon

Chapter 6 Lena

Chapter 7 Tayvon

Chapter 8 Lena

Chapter 9 Tayvon

Chapter 10 Lena

Chapter 11 Tayvon

Chapter 12 Lena

Chapter 13 Tayvon

Chapter 14 Lena

Chapter 15 Tayvon

Chapter 16 Lena

Chapter 17 Tayvon

Chapter 18 Lena

Chapter 19 Tayvon

Chapter 20 Lena

Chapter 21 Tayvon

Chapter 22 Lena

Chapter 23 Tayvon

Chapter 24 Lena

Chapter 25 Tayvon

Chapter 26 Lena

Chapter 27 Tayvon

Chapter 28 Lena

Chapter 29 Tayvon

Chapter 30 Lena

Chapter 31 Tayvon

Chapter 32 Lena

Chapter 33 Tayvon

Chapter 34 Lena

Chapter 35 Tayvon

Chapter 36 Lena

Chapter 37 Tayvon

Chapter 38 Lena

Chapter 39 Tayvon

Chapter 40 Lena

Chapter 41 Tayvon

Chapter 42 Lena

Chapter 43 Tayvon

Chapter 44 Lena

Chapter 45 Tayvon

Chapter 46 Lena

Chapter 47 Tayvon

Chapter 48 Lena

Chapter 49 Tayvon

Chapter 50 Lena

Chapter 51 Tayvon

Chapter 52 Lena

Chapter 53 Tayvon

Chapter 54 Lena

Chapter 55 Tayvon

Chapter 56 Lena

Dedication

First and foremost, I would like to thank God for blessing me with my special talent to be able to write my seventh book. I would like to thank my mom and dad for always encouraging me to do my best in whatever I do in life. I would like to thank my siblings for always supporting me, Lamont, Brian, Shakelia, Tyra and Leana. I would also like to thank some special people that always gave me that extra push that I needed when I felt like giving up and has supported me from day one; Erica Capers, Matthew Collins, Anitra Hammett, Sylinda F. Johnson, Angela Richburg, Lawanda Samuels, Kevina S. Mouzon, Sharia White, Tangie Armstrong, Rhonda Williams, Elroy Wilson, and Artrice N. Singleton. I would like to thank two great people who are no longer here and are looking down on me from above. Thank you both for your support through the years and you are definitely missed Lee Pickens, and Tyrone Fogle. Last but not least, I would like to thank my grandparents who are no longer here, the late John and Daisy Carraway and Richard and Ida Mae McCray. Thank you all for your love through the years. You are definitely appreciated.

Chapter 1

TAYVON WILLIAMS

I sat in my room listening to the hard rain that continued to pour for the past hour. My room was quiet and dark, as I closed my eyes, wishing that my life was a little easier. I’m only thirteen years old but I feel like the amount of pain and suffering I’ve had to endure my entire life was more than any grown thirty year old man could take.

I’m the oldest child to Jackie and Rollin Williams. I have a ten year old brother RJ and a seven year old sister Angel. I’ve always felt like the black sheep of the family since I’ve always been my parents’ darkest child.

RJ and Angel are my father’s complexion, which is a light, golden brown tone. My mother is a little darker but she’s lighter than me. My father would always call me names like tar baby, little monkey, or blackie, when he came home drunk from the clubs and bars, which seemed like every other night.

I’ve heard those horrible names so much as a child, that I actually thought they were a part of my name that no one shared with me. I often looked at myself in the mirror, hating myself and questioning God, on why he made me so much darker than RJ and Angel, but I never got an answer to my question.

It seems that God was punishing me for the way I looked and I’ve spent plenty of nights crying myself to sleep, wondering why I was cursed with being the ugly duckling of the family. My mother’s parents Carolyn and Peter Shaw were almost as bad as my father with all the names they called me as a child growing up. I remember one particular day we were at my grandparents’ house outside playing and I came inside to use the restroom. I overheard Grandma telling Granddad how in the world did they have such a black, ugly monkey as their grandchild. Grandma’s words nearly crushed me and I knew from that very moment that I had to have tough skin to face this evil and cruel world, otherwise it would tear me alive.

I thought my family was supposed to help lift me up when the kids from school or on my bus would call me names; instead they were the ones doing the name calling and tearing me down. I kept believing that one day I was going to be successful and the same people that called me names and made me feel like I was nothing, would have no other choice but to respect me as the person God made me to be.

I sat up from my bed and pulled out the bottle of rubbing alcohol that I had under my bed and started rubbing it on my arms and trying my best to rub some on my back from the welts of the belt marks that my father whipped me with thirty minutes ago because I didn’t want to eat my black-eyed peas that my mother made for dinner.

My mother told me I didn’t have to eat them but my father told me I wasn’t getting up from the table unless I ate them all. I took my napkin and raked all my peas inside and threw them under some trash in the trash can. Just in case my father was to open the trash can he wouldn’t see a balled up napkin with the black-eyed peas inside. He would have to remove some of the trash to see what I’d done.

I then got up from the table and put my dishes in the sink, when my father yelled out to me and asked if I ate my peas. I lied of course and told him I did. My father ran to the trash can to look inside, just to see if I was lying or not. He took the first layer of trash out of the can and there it was. He spotted the balled up napkin that I raked my peas inside. I had tears in my eyes because I just knew I was about to get the worst whipping of my life for lying.

My father pulled the napkin out of the trash can and opened it. He then slapped me so hard across my face, that I thought a part of my face was still left on his hand. I yelled out in pain as I fell on the floor. My mother ran towards me. What happened! My mother yelled, as she helped me off the floor. This little black tar baby lied to me and he knows I don’t like liars! Daddy yelled. Rollin it’s okay. Tay will eat his peas the next time. Let him go to his room and do his homework, Mom said. No! This little monkey is going to learn to never lie to me again! My father yelled, as he pushed my mother out of the way and grabbed me by the arm. Go to your room and I’ll be in there shortly! You’re going to stop lying to me, if I have to beat it out of you! My father yelled.

I walked to my room and within minutes, I heard my father’s hard footsteps walking down the hallway. I knew what time it was as I closed my eyes and whispered a quick prayer to God. God please don’t let my father whip me too bad. Amen, I said, as I heard my bedroom door open.

My father took off his belt and closed the door behind him. Daddy! Daddy No! Please don’t whip Tay Tay! Angel yelled, as she ran in my room, passing Daddy and threw her little arms around me, as if she were my protecting shield.

Angel was screaming from the top of her lungs, trying to save me. I looked at my little sister as she was trying so hard to protect me and I knew no matter how loud she screamed or cried, her tears couldn’t save or protect me at this time.

My father grabbed Angel and snatched her away from me. I guess you want what I’m going to give your brother huh? Daddy said, as he whipped my sister in front of me. Angel screamed out and I wished I was strong and big enough to stop my abusive, drunken father from whipping Angel. He finally stopped whipping her and told her to get her butt out of the room.

Daddy grabbed me and whipped me. Wherever he could get a swing on my body for the belt to land is where he hit me. When he was done he looked at me as I was still crying and rubbing my arms. I bet your black monkey looking self, won’t lie to me again huh? Daddy said, as he walked out my room.

I jumped on my bed, grabbing my pillow and bawled my eyes out. Why didn’t my mother come in my room to protect me and pull my monster of a father off me? But she was no match for my father and she couldn’t do any more than I could do.

About ten minutes later, I heard my mom screaming. I knew my father was now beating her. I knew I was supposed to stay in my room but I wanted to check on Angel and see if she was okay.

I tiptoed down the hallway, looking around as if my father was about to come out of the room and see me heading to Angel’s room and whip me again. I ran into Angel’s room and she was sitting on the bed beside RJ, crying. RJ was rubbing Angel’s back and crying as well. I walked up to Angel as she jumped off the bed and ran to me, hugging me tightly. Are you okay Tay, Tay? Angel asked, with tears in her eyes.

My little sister was in pain but all she cared about was me. I’m okay Angel. Look, you shouldn’t have done that, I said. I know but I didn’t want Daddy to beat you Tay, Tay. He might hurt you, Angel said. I know but I’m okay. Don’t do that again. Okay, I said, kissing my sister on the cheek. I won’t Tay, Tay. I don’t know why Daddy is so mean, Angel said. I know Angel. I don’t know why either, I replied. I hate him Tay! I hate him so much! RJ said, loudly. RJ, please lower your voice before he hears you, I said, whispering. I don’t care! I hope he hears me! I hate him with everything in me! RJ said. I know the feeling RJ. I know the feeling, I replied.

I sat on Angel’s bed, consoling my little brother and sister as they continued crying, wishing I could keep them safe but I knew I couldn’t. I stood up from their bed and walked toward their bedroom door. I heard two doors slammed and I knew what that was about. Dad was leaving from their bedroom and the second door was him leaving out of the front door.

I went over to the window and saw Daddy driving away. He’s gone. Let’s go check on Mom, I said. We all walked over to Mom’s room and opened the door. Mom was sitting on the bed, holding her face. Mom are you okay? I asked. Mom looked up at us and she had a black eye and bruises all over her face.

My heart ached when I saw that my father used my mother’s beautiful face as his punching bag, as if she was nothing, the way he treated us our entire lives. Yes baby, I’m okay, Mom said, barely able to stand up to walk. Mom sat back down on the bed.

I knew at this very moment that our lives were about to change because this was my father’s last time ever putting his hands on us and I was going to make sure of that. That’s a promise I intend to keep.

Chapter 2

SELENA HARDIN

I just got to work and I was anticipating going back home and crawling back into bed. I haven’t been to work ten minutes yet and I’m already thinking about going back home. If my manager says one thing to me, it might be a bad day for us both.

I’ve been working here at Bennett Junior High School as a dietary staff for fourteen years and I must say it seems like every day I want to just quit. The kids here are not that bad but they can be a bit disrespectful at times and the teachers are no better. Some of the teachers barely say good morning to you when they see you or when they come through the breakfast line. They act like we’re beneath them since we work in the cafeteria and they’re in the classrooms.

I’m thirty-six years old and it seems like my life has no meaning at all. I’m almost forty, never been married and I have no children or anything. My last serious relationship was with Wallace and it’s been over five years now since we stopped dating.

I threw my apron on and walked into the kitchen. My manager had an angry look on her face as if someone made her mad this morning. I sure hope she doesn’t come out her mouth wrong at me because there’s no telling what I might say.

Gayle Adger is my manager and also one of my church members. Gayle is one of the nosiest people I’ve ever met. She’s always up in everybody’s business so she can go run to gossip about it. Good morning Lena, Gayle said. Good morning, I replied. I hope you’re doing well. Can you please get the French fries out the freezer for lunch today? The kids are having hamburgers and fries today, Gayle said. Sure, I replied.

I grabbed my jacket and put it over my apron. I hate going in the freezer. It’s super cold in there. I took the cart with me into the freezer and pulled down twenty bags of fries and placed them on the cart and brought them back to the kitchen. Here you go Mrs. Sally, I said. Thank you Lena, Mrs. Sally said.

I walked to the other side of the kitchen and started drying off the trays from this morning’s breakfast. The bell rang for the kids to go to their homerooms. I watched the kids scatter out in the halls to get to their destinations.

I finished drying all the trays and silverware and put them away. I started preparing the sandwiches and salads for lunch for the kids that wanted something else besides burgers and fries. I made up about fifty salads and fifty ham and cheese sandwiches and covered them up. How many salads did you fix? Gayle asked. About fifty, I said. Lena, you know better than to make that many salads. I always told you to make no more than twenty-five or thirty each day, that way you won’t waste any, Gayle said. What difference does it make how many I make up? The salads are always gone by the end of the day with teachers and students so I don’t know what you’re making such a big deal about. Yesterday I didn’t make enough and I had to run back in the kitchen to make more so this time I made more so I won’t have to make anymore, I said. Stop talking back to me and do like I ask you, Gayle said.

I took my apron off and walked in Gayle’s face. Look! You getting on my last nerve. I don’t know what makes you think that you can talk to me like I’m five years old but you’re about to see the one you’re playing with. Keep talking to me like I’m a child and see what’s going to happen, I said, pointing my finger in her face. Lena, are you threatening me? Gayle asked. You call it as you want but like I said, keep talking to me like I’m a child and I’ll show you better than I can tell you, I said, walking off. Lena, you better be glad we’re short of help, otherwise I would fire your behind right now, Gayle said. No you better be glad, I said.

I got a cup of coffee and a Danish and sat at the table in the cafeteria. All the workers were looking at me strange because they knew it wasn’t break time and I was eating a Danish as well. Of course my manager was going to make me pay for it but I didn’t care.

I finished my Danish and coffee and went back in the kitchen to chop up some carrots for the veggie cup they were having today. As I grabbed the carrots, I wondered what was keeping me at this school for as long as I’ve been here. I don’t have to put up with this woman. After Daddy died a year ago, he left me a five hundred-thousand-dollar life insurance policy. I’m so glad he put that in a will, otherwise my mother wouldn’t have given me one brown cent if Daddy left it all to her.

Daddy knew what he was doing when he gave me that amount in his will. For some reason, my mother acted like she hated me growing up. Maybe because I’ve never been a little skinny thing or as beautiful as my first cousins were. She always made fun of me and told me if I lose some weight, then I wouldn’t be so ugly and could make some friends and get a boyfriend one day. Mom never cared what she said to me or how it made me feel. I promised myself once I became grown, I was pretty much done with her.

I’ve always longed for a great relationship with my mother but that never happened. My mother was more concerned with her image and her little uppity friends. If one of her friends bought a Lexus, my mom was getting a new Mercedes, or a Jaguar or something to top what they got. She always wanted to keep up with the Joneses.

All of her friends came to my father’s funeral and most of them didn’t even know my mother had a daughter other than my name was listed in the obituary. I know deep down my mother is ashamed of me because I’m not the beauty queen and size four that she wished I was or had the glamourous job that she would’ve wanted for me. I guess that’s why my parents let me stay with my father’s parents.

My grandparents loved me and gave me all the love and attention I needed. They knew my mother or father weren’t capable of doing that so they took up the slack that they refused to do.

I pray that one day God will bring my mother and I closer together because we’re all we have now. If I even become a mother, I sure hope that God allows me to love my child unconditionally, even when people are around. That’s something I never had.

Chapter 3

TAYVON

My mother was still crying while sitting on the bed with RJ and Angel. I went to the linen closet and got a washcloth and grabbed some frozen peas out of the freezer so Mom could put it on her black eye. Here you go Mom, I said, handing it to her. Baby, what’s this for? Mom asked. For you to put it on your eye. It will help with the swelling, I said. Oh thanks baby, Mom said, as she took the cloth and frozen peas from me.

Mom wrapped the peas up in the cloth and placed it on her eye. Mom, I know you don’t want to hear this but Daddy has a drinking problem. I’m not going to sit around and let him kill you or one of us because it may not be a next time. It’s your job to protect us, not the other way around. I’m sick of living like this. I’m scared to sometimes even breathe around him because I’m afraid he’s going to hear me and get mad and beat me again. Now if you don’t want to do something about him then I will right now, I said.

My mother finally looked up at me with sadness all over her face. You’re right baby. I don’t know what to do, Mom said. Mom, you don’t have long to figure it out because I’m going to call the police tonight so they can take Daddy to jail, I said. You better not! Mom said. Yes Mom I am. Daddy beat me because I didn’t eat my black-eyed peas and it wasn’t a normal few licks across my butt, he was hitting me wherever the belt fell on me. Angel came in trying to protect me and he turned around and beat her too. Why weren’t you in my room trying to protect me and Angel? Angel is only seven years old and you should’ve tried. I will not continue to live like this! I yelled. I know baby, Mom said. Mom we love you but you have to get us away from Daddy before he flips and does something crazy, I said.

Mama started crying loudly as she hugged me tightly. Mom, if I show my teachers and principal my bruises, which I’m going to do tomorrow, they’re going to take us all from you. You’re going to lose us all. Is that what you want? I asked. Of course not baby. I don’t want to lose any of you, Mom said. Then you have to decide if you’re going to stay with him and allow him to keep beating you until he kills you or lose us to the state because I won’t let him hit me again, I said. I’m going to do something now, I said. I want all three of you to go in your rooms and grab some pants, shirts, underwear, socks, your coat and put them in a garbage bag. We’re leaving here tonight, Mom said.

I ran into the kitchen and gave RJ and Angel a trash bag for them to put their clothes in. Don’t try to get everything. Just a few things, but try to get at least five pair of pants and shirts and make sure you have your underwear. Keep on your shoes and put your coat on so you will have that on already, I said. Okay Tay, Tay, Angel said, grabbing the trash bag from me.

I ran into my room and grabbed my things as quickly as I could. I tried to grab everything that Mom told us to get. I ran into the kitchen and grabbed a few Ziploc bags and a grocery bag to get out toothbrushes and toothpaste as well as a few washcloths and towels.

I had everything I needed in my trash bag and I hoped Angel and RJ did as well. You two have everything? I yelled. Yes, I got everything, Angel said. So do I, RJ replied. Good, let’s go see if Mom is ready, I said. We all went to Mom’s door and knocked on it. Mom, are you ready? I asked, pushing her bedroom door open. Mom was sitting in the same spot on her bed as before we left her room. Something told me Mom wasn’t going anywhere. Baby, I’m going to make sure everything is going to be fine. I want you all to go to your rooms and wait about ten minutes after your father comes home. Tay, I want you to get RJ and Angel and you all go next door and call the police. When you call the police, you tell them what your father did to you and Angel earlier but don’t tell them what he did to me. The police have to think what he did to me just happened. Do you understand? Mom asked. Yes I do, I said. Good. Now you three go to your rooms, Mom replied. Okay, I replied, following Mom’s instructions.

I sat on my bed thinking about my Dad not being in my life. Not being able to smell the liquor on his breath, not hearing the cursing and the name calling. I’m just glad I don’t have to endure the pain from his belt while he’s whipping me or hear the screams that my mother would yell out at night when my father was hurting her as well.

My thoughts quickly vanished when I heard a car door slam shut. I knew my father was on his way into the house. I waited