Home Birth On Your Own Terms

By Heather Baker

The freebirthing manual you did not know you needed until you decided to birth at home. Everything you need is here to support your birthing desires. 

• Language: English
• Publisher: Heather Baker
• Release date: Jan 22, 2021
• ISBN: 9798227393807

Book preview

Copyright © 2019 by Heather Baker. All Rights Reserved

1st Published March 2019, 2nd Edition January 2021

Cover Photographer Devon Janusheske

Cover Photo of the Baldridge Family

Cover Design by Laura McCormick, Erica Alexander

Editing by Julia Blumenthal, Vera Kevic and Maranda Simonet

Formatting by Erica Alexander, Yara ElMaghrabi

Images contained within the book have been released to the Author for sole permission to use within this book. They may not be reproduced in any form.

Disclaimer: Although I am a trained Midwife, I am not diagnosing or giving medical advice. This book is a guide and tool to find your way in educating yourself about the subjects discussed in this book such as self care and birthing at home by oneself. This book is not a substitute for medical care. The Author is not responsible for any health needs that may require medical attention and is not liable for any negative consequences to any person reading and following the information contained in this book.

To have your birth story or photos added, please email

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CONTENTS

Dedication

INTRODUCTION

Getting Pregnant

Already Pregnant

Prenatal Care

Self, Home Prenatal Care

Common Discomforts in Pregnancy

Preparation for Birth

Birth Plans

Birth Affirmations

Labor

Types of Labors

Pain Management in Labor

Positions for Labor

Stages of Labor

Your Baby Is Here!

The 1st Hour After You Give Birth

Your Baby in the 1st Hour

Placenta Delivery

4th Trimester for the Mother

Your Baby in the 4th Trimester

Postpartum Birth Matters

Placenta Consumption

Herbs

Homeopathics

Essential Oils

Complications in Pregnancy

Issues/Complications in Labor

How to Perform CPR on a Newborn

Postpartum Complications/Emergencies

Resources

Birth Stories

Edna’s Breech Birth

Undisturbed Instinct

The Twin Birth of Aoife and Saoirse

2 Unassisted Births

The Freebirth of Archer Wild

Birth Story of Olive Paisley

A Nuchal Hand

A Healing Birth

An Undisturbed Birth

An Unexpected Breech

VBAC

The Birth of Waverly

Our Perfect Unassisted Birth

A Family Birth

Freebirth Story of Maria Faith

After Thoughts from Parents

Closing Remarks

Dedication

To all the moms who have asked me to attend them in such an intimate and special moment. You allowed me to learn and educate others so they could birth the way they wanted, unassisted.

Thanks to:

My children, for if I had not had them, I would not have become a Midwife or be the woman I am today. For their understanding of my love in this work, the time away from them to attend women in the wee hours of the night and for the countless hours it took to get this book published.

Thanks to:

My late father, for his stubbornness and drive to get things done on his own. If I had not seen his determination/success or inherited his traits, I would not have come this far in life.

Thanks to:

The women who strive for more control in their birthing rights and needs. You are the reason this book has come to fruition. I applaud you for being more than sheep following others. Your children will benefit most from your actions.

and MOST importantly:

To those who shared their personal stories and photographs, which inspire other women to achieve their own wonderful births. Your support is always needed.

INTRODUCTION

I wrote Home Birth on Your Own Terms to promote natural birth, for it to be widely known, accepted and spoken about. I wanted those who inquired about freebirth, to feel supported. I saw a tremendous need to educate families who so desired it. This has been a work in progress for several years, with many late nights of inspiration and anger, for what I would read and hear from mothers who did NOT get the births they really desired or should have achieved! I could only do so much consulting of moms (handfuls at a time) or cheer on the many women in groups, desperately searching for answers to their many questions.

I started writing lists of what women needed help with, answers to, inspiration, remedies, and support ideas into one place. I saw a no frills, easy to understand text in layman’s terms that anyone could use. I wanted to make it clear that you did not have to have the mind of a midwife or doctor, to birth by yourself. You just needed faith and some wisdom on your side.

So who am I? I am a Traditional Midwife of over 2 decades, and a mother of 5 children, all born at home. The last 4, I birthed unassisted. I chose to do this because the options in my city were sparse and not to my liking. The midwives were becoming scarily and increasingly medical, had transport rates over 40%, and they did not have the same mindset as I did. It was costly to hire any one of them and I was not going to risk spending all that money with no chance of a refund, for a 50% chance at birthing at home with them?? NO THANK YOU!! My feeling was that, I had already been supporting mothers myself for several years by the time my second child was due, so why not just do the birth myself?! My first birth was a long labor where the midwife only arrived an hour before my child was born… and that was a pretty life changing birth, to do so much on our own. So with my second I decided pretty early on to go solo. A rapid intense 2.5 hour birth resulted and I was hooked. I actually CRAVED having another for the rush!

I myself have had many experiences under my belt, with each of my own births including: a baby born in the caul, a nuchal arm which led to a truly stuck baby, water broken for over 16 hours with 2 babies, a 35 week 5 day preemie birth due to stress, a precipitous birth, a waterbirth, I woke up pushing my fourth baby out after a long 2 day semi stalled labor, 2 placenta previas that only became marginal by birth time, many miscarriages since my last birth and secondary infertility caused by thyroid disorders and MTHFR mutation. ALL of this taught me so many things, that I could relate to others experiences and most importantly that there are so many variations of normal in pregnancy and birthing. I learned that each birth is truly different. And certainly, birthing gives me the biggest rush/high that I have ever felt in my life… It is almost impossible for me to describe. Elation? Ecstasy similar to orgasm? An expedition that led me to feeling like I was the most powerful person on the planet? There is no perfect phrase. All I know is that it CHANGED ME, every time.

I have attended births for moms all over the world, witnessed every scenario, including those that I didn’t think were possible. I have learned that ANYTHING is possible and there are no set rules when it comes to birth. Certainly in the text books we read as providers, they barely cover the out of range of normal things that are very real and can lead to a great birth. I have seen these things happen and WORK! All we can do is flow with it, prevent issues and fix them when they arise and most importantly, sometimes we just need time in labor for it to all unfold like it must.

I hope this reaches the families that have little access to health care and basically have no other choice than to birth unassisted. They will rely on faith, their own education and birth their babies as our ancestors have.

Use this book as a guide and an outpost for reference. I believe in unassisted birth so much that I take it as a compliment when a previous client births on her own! To me, that means I did my job. I educated, I supported… I trusted in the way that nature and our bodies work... and then I passed it on. I am not one to take away power from moms. I encourage them to embrace their divine gift of growing and giving life and for their birth to be seen as a sacred and glorious event. Birthing is indeed an unbelievably, POWERFUL and LIFE CHANGING EXPERIENCE. Too long it has been looked at as a disease or a complication of life. I see it more as a right of passage and an empowering rebirth of your own self and life thereafter.

Unfortunately as a Midwife, I often get mothers who have had terrible, traumatic births and my job is to heal them from that pain with the birth they are about to have. I believe I have succeeded in this task every single time. Pregnancy, birth and the postpartum period, is about learning, teaching ourselves to go back to nature and listen to our bodies and souls in what we so desire. It is actually much more than just pushing a baby out and receiving this new child. It is about the capacity we have within ourselves, our beliefs, insecurities, strengths and weaknesses. It is about our relationships that brought us here today and how they will change in the future. Birth is the foundation to your life thereon. Amazing right? Never thought of it that way? Well I see it at every birth I attend. Seeing a mom for many months, then through postpartum... I get to feel every emotion and form a strong relationship with the family and mother. There is no other experience that compares with this feeling when witnessing such amazing acts of accomplishment. The family is transformed and oozes deeper with love.

This book is not written to change your mind or make you want to birth in the ways I have seen, as beautiful and inspiring. I would hope you have already come here, having done your research and are looking for support and guidance to achieve what YOU so want. I also didn’t feel the need to write a book of statistics and references, because again, there are many of those out there or you can easily google thousands of pages of information on whatever you wish. I saw a need for something else. A how to book, that would be used as a guide to rummage through and go to the sections that are not spoken of often or have it all IN ONE PLACE. Most unassisted birthers are stuck with medical texts, a few fabulous books about natural birth and stories of moms who actually got their unmedicated birth… but there are very few books on birthing at home without medical care or assistance. Yet, there are indeed SO MANY WOMEN doing just that! They have few options in providers that listen or are free of rigid constraints. Mother’s actually want to be in charge and responsible 100 percent for their pregnancy and birth choices. Many women feel cornered into delivering a certain way, by a certain time or on someone else’s time and it is very costly! The ever growing regulations to make midwives certified, who then work under doctors, just adds in more protocols, time constraints and rules for the birthing mother when there need not be. Enough already!

If you want to birth in a way that is safe, empowering, economical and on your terms, then this book should help support you to do so. Educating oneself is the best gift to ourselves. Going in blindly is never a good idea. So read your heart out, watch birth videos, take notes, write birth affirmations, meditate, listen to your body and follow what it tells you. If you run into issues, by all means seek an answer to heal yourself or follow up with a medical professional, midwife, doctor, chiropractor, naturopath or so on. Let’s begin.

Getting Pregnant

Most of you will already be pregnant when you get this book. That's great, and many congrats on this new journey! I also want to address the moms who may be trying, thinking about getting pregnant or are still processing their last birth and looking for another way. It is never too soon to prepare.

Mind set

Deciding to get pregnant may have been a very easy decision or a very thought out, planned scenario.

While you are still trying, it is great to be dreaming up your wants and desires for the pregnancy and birth. To catch up on some things that you may have not known prior. And if you have never been pregnant before this is a great way for you to go in, untainted by the fear mongering stories people love to throw on you when you are noticeably pregnant. Steer clear from those people, just nod or cut them off and walk away. This is not the time to be nice and polite. Why waste your precious time listening to nonsense?

Fill your thoughts with positive stories, beautiful words and inspirational discussions that bring you joy and excitement. Maybe get a journal to write about your hopes and desires in the future. Write a letter to your future baby or babies. Dream and fantasize about how your pregnancy and birth can be and then, make those things happen.

Nutrition

Prepregnancy planning should include a healthy consumption of food or diet. If you were slacking in this area and it was not of importance to you prior, NOW is the time to change all that. It is much harder to change your habits the second you find out you are pregnant. You should be consuming a diet rich in a variety of foods including fruits and vegetables, healthy fats, lean meats and omega 3 rich fish.

Sample of what is needed per day:

2-4 servings of fruit

4 servings of dairy

3 servings of proteins from meat, poultry, fish, eggs, or nuts

6 servings of grains

4-8 glasses of water

Make sure your diet is low or free of artificial sugars, caffeine and bleached flour. Be careful with simple carbohydrates too. Don’t skip meals, make sure you steer clear of pesticides in your food. Therefore, if you can buy organic goods, that would be best for you. Same with meats, fish and dairy. They should be free of antibiotics, hormones, chemicals, etc.

Also be aware of the fat on your body. We all need some fat on us for energy stores and to maintain our body heat. If we have too little fat, it often causes issues with getting pregnant or maintaining a pregnancy. On the other hand, carrying too much fat can cause issues with hormones, adrenals, insulin resistance, and so on. This can alter menstrual cycles and ovulation. So make sure you are eating well and exercising on a regular basis. If you are too thin, lessening your workouts is best, as it can heighten testosterone in those with little overall fat. See further information on Nutrition in the next chapter.

Slow to get pregnant or infertility

If you are to be a first time mom, then I am sure your mind is spinning with how much there is to learn, digest and process.

We have all heard that it is normal for it to take 6-12 months to get pregnant naturally. However, for some of us, that is too long or we may not have a lot of time to wait around. Many women are trying to get pregnant in their later years so time is of the essence. Listed are some things so you can get pregnant faster.

Look into issues with low vaginal pH, this in essence means your vaginal pH is too acidic and hostile therefore, it kills off the sperm. If you change your diet or add a product like Preseed, the pH will likely heighten. The preseed allows for short term results, whereas eating differently can permanently alter your pH as long as you are eating foods that alter the pH to be higher. You can also try a baking soda swab to heighten your vaginal pH. If you would like to test it, you can buy pH paper to do so.

Other reasons for not getting pregnant? Deficiencies. Your iron may be too low, B12 and vitamin D3 deficiencies, can all affect the body by making it tired and weak. Therefore there is little energy your body can put towards conceiving or staying pregnant. You should be able to easily fix this by taking supplements.

Short luteal phase is a major factor for not getting pregnant. This means your progesterone drops far too early in the second half of your cycle. Most women have a typical 14 day phase after ovulation. If you are feeling cramps, have spotting or bleeding prior to 14 days from the time of ovulation, then you may not be able to get pregnant. If you do, it may end in a chemical pregnancy. This means as soon as the fertilized egg is trying to implant into the wall of the uterus, the lining has already started to shed. The egg needs a fluffy, prepared uterine lining to live. If the progesterone is too low, you never have a running chance to even get pregnant. You could get a fertilized egg every month and never know it because it attempts to implant and is met with no chance at life. The easy fix is taking a supplement prescribed by a doctor, bought online from a place that does not require a prescription, or take an over the counter progesterone cream. High dose vitamin B can help as well but it is not nearly as strong as progesterone. Vitamin B will help lengthen the second half of a cycle (however it can also delay ovulation if taken in high doses in the first half of the cycle.) The cream can usually be found at health food stores or online. These are not prescription strength so you need to use more. Most women apply it to varying parts of the body for quick absorption. It is not my first choice but is very helpful for women who have little access to a doctor who will prescribe.

If you get the medication from a doctor or online with or without a prescription, then you will see the typical dosage is 200 mg a day. This is best taken at night orally or vaginally. Orally, you will feel the effects quicker. It’s sort of like a drunk, sleepy or woozy feeling and thus why recommended at night. It can make you dizzy and tired. The best route is vaginally because the highest dose goes right to the uterus however, some women notice it causes them to get yeast infections, it is messy and it can leak quite a bit, which is a bit of a nuisance. Leaking can be troublesome because it’s hard to gauge how much you are using. The vaginal route does have the least symptoms associated with its use though. You can switch it up nightly with either the vaginal or oral route, if you wish.

Are you nursing a baby already? Some women find themselves pregnant when they are already nursing a child. This does not cause a problem for most women, but some are sensitive to the hormone changes. It can cause strong contractions, may lower milk supply greatly or cause hormone imbalance. If you want to try to get pregnant and are nursing, and your cycle has not returned, you may need to wean your child to bring back your fertility.

Another reason for recurrent loss can be clotting issues. In this situation, the body attacks the embryo/fetus and forms a blood clot or starts bleeding near the baby’s implantation spot. Something as little as a baby aspirin a day can help this. Some need daily injections to thin the blood.

MTHFR gene or mutation is now very common in 40% of the population. This is not talked about much as it’s fairly new in the testing world but it is very important to look into if you have unexplained infertility. In one mutation, the body is unable to process folic acid. Folic acid or folate is taken to prevent birth defects. However, in this particular scenario, the remedy is to not ingest folic acid and to only take folate at 400-800 mcg to support the body prior to getting pregnant or during pregnancy.

Thyroid issues are very common these days and yet the least understood by obgyn’s and doctors. However, your thyroid is the control center to your entire body. If it is not working properly, the whole system is affected... your immune system, brain, adrenals, heart, metabolism, digestion, ability to heat or cool itself. Thyroid issues typically stem from adrenal fatigue due to stress, not eating well or lack of sleep. You typically have at least a few symptoms if you have a thyroid disorder. You can have several or all of the following.

Symptoms of HYPERthyroid: Anxiety, depression, loose bowels, sweating, inability to sleep or don’t need much, too much energy, heart palpitations, hair falling out, moody, lack of a period or weak ovulation.

HYPOthyroid: Depression, lethargic or lack of energy, need a lot of sleep, muscle weakness, cold, dry skin, cracking heels, brain fog, forgetfulness, lack of a sex drive, hair falling out, moody, menstrual issues or excessive bleeding.

If your doctor even agrees to test for thyroid disorder be armed to ask for the whole panel because most doctors will say that your thyroid is fine when indeed it is not. You cannot just get a TSH test and call it a day. You need to see the whole picture. Most health care providers are not educated well enough in this area. You really need to see an endocrinologist or a functional medicine doctor who is trained in this disorder and infertility. When looking at thyroid, blood testing TSH, free t3 and free t4, as well as any antibodies the body is making, is VERY important and also helps to show a basic picture of what is going on within that woman’s body.

Most doctors believe that the TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) can be above 2 for pregnancy and be fine. This is not true. From the research I have seen, there is a 70% risk for pregnancy loss with a level above 2. Having a TSH level at 1.5 and under is optimal and desired. You could be at an optimal/safe level but once you get pregnant, your TSH level may shoot up dramatically. This would require medication to get it to go back down to a safe level for your pregnancy. You would likely have symptoms as well.

If you have antibodies that are positive in the body, then there is inflammation and the body may see an embryo/fetus as a foreign object or threat, and attack it. For instance, you may get hives even before a positive pregnancy test, feel extremely cold or lethargic or even have sudden swelling. In this scenario, a provider will likely have you use steroid medication such as prednisone, to lower your risk of the body rejecting the baby. The best option is to get your body to be optimal and in order, prior to pregnancy. At times, you don’t know the issue until you are actually pregnant. In this case, you may have to play with your medication dosage and get monthly labs to see what makes you the most stable, therefore helping to sustain the pregnancy. If you are older in age, you may not have time to get everything perfect before trying. Your egg reserve is much lower and hormones are changing quickly.

Additional fertility issues can include blocked tubes (which could potentially be fixed with a HSG flush or surgery), polycystic ovarian syndrome, hostile pH or uterine environment, untreated infections, endometriosis, etc. There are of course issues that can also affect sperm and you would not know this unless you have a full visual sperm test done at a clinic. This would find specific things such as: how many sperm are present, how many are normal, how many are moving, and if they can penetrate an egg. Sperm are easily affected by smoking, alcohol, drugs and medication, even exposure to chemicals or trauma to the testes. It takes a full 3 months for sperm to mature and grow within the male testicle. This means, it would take 3 months of changes within oneself before you would see any improvement on additional sperm testing.

Absolutely see a fertility specialist if you can’t figure out why you are not becoming pregnant. And remember, just because you have infertility issues, does not make you a walking time bomb or high risk client once you become pregnant. Some of you may have even had IVF to get pregnant! Perhaps you need to be on medication until 14 weeks or even longer depending on what the issue is but you can follow with a midwife or doctor for your labs, medication and still continue with your homebirth plans if you so wish.

Already Pregnant

"There is no better feeling than the

movement of life inside of you"

If you’ve had no issues getting pregnant and have a baby in your womb, then congrats and onto the next part!

The early weeks are both the most exciting and usually the hardest with sickness, exhaustion and questions as the baby grows rapidly. In the 1st trimester there is not much to do other than rest, eat well and take your vitamins and supplements.

Nutrition

IT IS ESSENTIAL that you eat healthy foods! You cannot just think about it or say you will... or make the ridiculous excuse that it’s easier said than done. What you eat or consume will grow your baby and placenta. So yes, it is indeed very important for your health as well as your child’s. Make it count.

You may decide to concentrate on one diet or another from paleo, vegan, gluten free or organic. Any changes that can better your health are great! When choosing fruits pay attention to the dirty dozen that are best bought organic, and those that aren’t as essential. See the list within this chapter

It is very important to never go more than 12 hours without consuming healthy food. The idea is to eat 3 main meals a day and several snacks in between to maintain a steady flow of nutrition to yourself and the baby. Your goal is to get in 60-100 grams of protein a day. You can get this in any form you wish or tolerate but avoid excess soy as it is estrogen based. I also think full fats and use of butter and salt are necessary in your diet.

The guideline for weight gain in pregnancy is 15-40 lbs depending on if you were underweight or overweight in the first place. The concern is not that you gain too much or too little. It is that you eat properly for you and your baby. I highly doubt that if you are eating properly and consciously, that you will gain too much and unless you are extremely ill or going without meals, that you would be underweight.

Let’s look at a few healthy examples of diets.

Brewer Diet

Eat high protein, use salt to taste or add it, and get a proper amount of calories for you and your baby. Although there are a few things I don’t love (the use of vegetable oil and any form of soy...) this is the diet I go to for any clients who show signs of toxemia or to prevent it if they had previous issues.