Lonely Tear: SLATE, #2

By Marianna Palmer

Loss of love, loss of self
Toni Ransom has dealt with many troubles in her life. But nothing compares to saying goodbye to her sister and her true love all in one sitting. She's more of a target to Tirade Angels than ever before.
Plus the powers that be seem to think she needs a Guardian Angel. Maybe she does. But a free-spirited guy hailing from the sixties isn't who she had in mind. Having a new winged wonder in her life, she still feels the sharp cut of losing her sister.
But Toni doesn't give up. She will have it all. A perfect family—everything. No matter who gets in her way.
Experience the exciting sequel to Savage Tear!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Marianna Palmer
• Release date: Jun 23, 2024
• ISBN: 9798224816965

Marianna Palmer

Marianna Palmer is a creative force who has been crafting captivating stories from the depths of her imagination since she first learned to dream. Encouraged by a dare from her sister, she bravely embarked on a journey into the world of writing, which became her sanctuary during years of solitude, personal challenges, and overcoming deep-rooted fears. With an unwavering passion for storytelling, Marianna pursued her education and proudly earned her BA degree. However, she didn't stop there. Preferring the enigmatic allure of privacy, she briefly disappeared from the public eye, resurfacing intermittently in the company of her sister before once again retreating into her world of words. Currently residing in the vibrant city of Tacoma, WA, Marianna draws inspiration from the beauty of her surroundings while reveling in the safety of her sister's presence. Determined to live life to the fullest, she fearlessly confronts the unknown, defying the daunting obstacles that once hindered her path.

Book preview

Lonely Tear

SLATE Book 2

Marianna Palmer

Marianna Palmer

Chapter One

I stared in abject horror at the villain in front of me. I did what I could. Bang! Bang! Bang! Three quick hits with my fist into the air conditioner’s white face. It bent the metal but didn’t do much else. It certainly didn’t fix it. I pushed the button, and it still didn’t turn on.

Summer was the worst time of the year, I decided. It was the only reason I was now up in the middle of the night, pouring abuse onto my air conditioner. It had been on the fritz for a week, and all I wanted to do was go to sleep covered up. Instead, the heat of the day still spread like a cloud throughout my room. I had to admit, though, this summer gave me a particular bias for my hatred of the sunny season.

Not only had my sister killed herself thanks to a manipulation by a Tirade Angel, I myself almost died by that same Tirade Angel. I had discovered that I could fight those bastards as a Savage Tear—and I had almost killed one. But not only that. Another Tirade Angel basically broke up with me—Vincent, my light in a dark sky, my knight in black armor. He wanted me to return to my life, date Carl, and have a happy ever after even with me being a Savage Tear. I never would.

Even now my skin ached with the memory of his caresses. But I hadn’t seen him or my sister ever since the wedding of my cousin. Oh, yeah, my sister was also a Tirade Angel. And I missed her too!

Here I was, a murderer of their kind, and I missed two Tirade Angels!

Work, you son of a bitch! I yelled, grabbing the big white square in both of my hands. It bent under my fingers. Crap.

My door banged open, and Ned appeared looking ready for battle. A bow in his hands. His battle stance feet sinking into my light blue carpet. A large white cat peered around the door.

Oops. I gave a sheepish grin. He didn’t look tired. Of course not, Immortals didn’t get sleepy. He was as usual too good looking for this world. Smooth skin with no imperfections. Tall, and more like a god than a human.

No enemy here. Just my air conditioner. Sorry.

He lowered his guard and bow, then looked back and forth between me kneeling on the floor and the air conditioner which was now decidedly bent. What’s wrong? The white cat sauntered in and sat next to Ned and meowed. Lion, quiet. Toni?

Wrong? Besides this misbegotten air conditioner! Nothing. I didn’t want to tell Ned of all people that I wished Vincent was here so we could share some more forbidden kisses. Give me a minute. Slam, slam, slam!

Ned caught my hand before I destroyed the air conditioner. He was easily stronger than me at this moment. My stupid Savage Tear’s powers came and went.

Toni, let me take a look at it, Ned said. Over the years, I’ve learned a few things about mechanics. He gave me a little push, and I scooted out of his way.

My heart melted a bit. It had been a long time since anyone had taken care of me. Lucky for the air conditioner. It’s so hot! I hate the heat.

Really? he asked, but he sounded amused. I wondered how many times I had mentioned that. One gets used to the seasons and learns to appreciate each one for their different wonders when they have experienced hundreds of them.

Whatever, I huffed and collapsed on my bed. I was in a mood tonight. It was my dreams. Their fault. Helena was in them. I wondered if she was talking to me or if I just wanted her to.

While Ned made noises in his throat and then went to get some tools, I once again tried to stop feeling so morose. It was good that Vincent was gone. And I really didn’t want Helena around if she was a Tirade Angel. She had sure let her stupid boyfriend work me over. There. It was done. I hated Helena. And it was good that Vincent wasn’t here so I couldn’t kill him.

Ned returned and started working. It reminded me of the time when Ned had played my father. It was nice. Lion stared at him working and then stared at me. It was weird to have such a white cat in my apartment.

Done! Ned said. He pushed the button and the frigid air I craved poured out. He turned the air conditioner to blasting—just the way I liked it. Now I could cover up and try to sleep. It was still very hard these days. Ned gave my face a look, and his softened with sympathy. If only I could fix your other problems as easily.

I frowned. I have no problems.

He snorted and stood up, swinging his hands. It was strange to see the raw energy that still existed in him. The energy of a Tirade Angel. Other than the hundreds of creatures out there that can and will try to kill you.

I fell back on my bed and stared at the ceiling. After Ethan, I should have been more worried. But all I felt was an emptiness in my heart. Somewhere that was once filled with my sister. And a new hole had been ripped out of me when Vincent disappeared. Do you know where Vincent is?

Ned pushed my legs aside and sat down next to me wrinkling my dark green blanket. He felt warm, comforting. "Toni, I can feel your longing. A remnant from my Tirade Angel days. You can’t long for a monster."

Not again! I don’t want to hear it. And I didn’t. Yes, I knew that Vincent’s status as a Tirade Angel made a relationship between us impossible, but I couldn’t help my heart. It had given itself up for lost the moment Vincent had appeared on my dresser. Even now I waited with a trapped breath for him to float down through my ceiling. I could see in my mind’s eye that full head of black hair. Those sky-like eyes that drove me crazy. His wings, though far from an angel’s, were full of stars, a night sky I could fall into.

Vincent had left me alone with a gigantic emptiness.

I had always held a darkness inside me, but it had gotten worse when my sister died. Life had stopped being worthwhile. Vincent had let me see life again. And now that Helena was a Tirade Angel, I could somewhat ignore the last image I had of her but…

I needed Vincent, damn it! I could fight the darkness for the sake of my mother and my sister and even Ned who stayed to protect me. But Vincent made everything infinitely easier. I saw the beauty of life when he was near. He gave me something to fight for—a reason. Without him my motivation was lacking.

You will be destroyed if you love him, Ned pointed out breaking into my thoughts.

No duh. I knew all of this. Of course, I knew more than ever thanks to Ned’s lectures on being safe. For me, if I ever got close enough to Vincent, I’d lose more than I could imagine.

Ned sighed. He put his elbow on his knee and stared at me glumly. You are still an amazing being, Toni. Savage Tears are long dead in this world. The fact that somehow you have succumbed to this false love is troubling in the extreme.

I wanted to deny the word love. Say that Vincent meant nothing. But without Vincent, I felt as if I had lost my heart, my liver, my kidneys.

You have no reason to be worried. I flattened my comforter around my raised knees and bumped into Ned’s solid back. I had no idea how or why I got so comfortable with him. But I had. If you could have seen what I did to Ethan… Well, every time I close my eyes, I see that happening to Vincent.

Ned snarled. It might have scared me before—it sounded like rocks rolling over gravel. But now… well, I guess I was getting used to monsters in my life.

It’s you I’m worried about. You are at a pivotal age. Your powers will only grow. I want you living to a ripe age. In fall, you start your junior year of high school and soon enough you’ll be graduating. Maybe you should just… forget Vincent.

Sure, why not. I’ll forget him. Forget the guy who made light come into my life. Oh! And I’ll also forget every other Tirade Angel in this world! I held my hand across my mouth. No wonder I couldn’t rest! Fear of what Ethan wanted to do to me hit hard. Vincent could help me sleep. I can’t seem to.

Okay. Go ahead and lie back.

I flopped down and watched Ned. I wondered if he had the same skills as Vincent. But he didn’t touch my head like Vincent had once.

He sat in my window seat and looked off into space. Lion jumped on his lap and started purring. Ned absentmindedly stroked him. Let me tell you a story.

I groaned. Really?

Shush. Now there was once a great gladiator. Before that he was a great father, but he was poor. His family starved around him. One day, he heard that people were making a fortune in the games.

I felt myself calming down. After my sister died, I didn’t want to move. Now, I couldn’t seem to stop. I blinked and let Ned’s voice soothe me. What was he telling me? What story?

"The man wasn’t a bad fighter. He had wrestled with his brothers for many years. Moreover, he had overpowered bulls in the field. He once fought for money and won. As he saw the ribs appearing in his sons’ and daughters’ skin, he made his choice.

On a dusty night, he traveled the long roads to the capital. The moon was full—it was red. A warning. But the man didn’t listen. He made it to the building for the games and they signed him up right away. They liked his size. His stature. They even liked the fact that he refused to look away when their eyes caught his.

I stared at Ned. This was his story. I could feel it. I bit my tongue from asking questions. I somehow knew this would end in a lesson for me. But I still wanted to hear it. His tones, smooth like silk, wrapped around me.

"The man didn’t know they wanted to break him. They sent him against the strongest animals, the best warriors. He fought and fought and won and won. His family was well taken care of. He sent money home whenever he could.

"But he was being broken. Every day, the spectators came. They didn’t want to see his victories. They wanted to see his defeat. They hated him.

He got lonelier and lonelier. He couldn’t see his family. One thing he didn’t know was once you sell yourself to the games, you’re there forever. Lion yowled and Ned laughed. Yes, I did forget the lion.

Lion?

They pitted him against a starving lion. He instead befriended it and helped it escape. Ned paused and petted Lion.

So, what happened? I finally asked. Did you make a deal with a Tirade Angel?

He shot me a look, and I moved backwards as it stabbed me. Yes, he finally said. I thought it to be the only way out. But if you’ll give me a chance, I’ll tell you…

What? That I’m making the same mistake? I was worked up again. So much for Ned’s voice.

I didn’t care. I had never agreed to Vincent just leaving like he had. And worse I had a feeling where he was—looking for Helena. A world that used to be mine, and yet I was far away from both.

You are. You are being seduced by a world you don’t understand. You can’t possibly know how dark it is. If you tried, you might be able to live a long time, Ned said. And I vow to you that I will ensure that even if I have to fight every Tirade Angel that comes your way.

I knew that included Vincent.

Good luck with that… I said sullenly. I pulled the blankets over me and held them up to my chin. I felt like a little girl hiding from the monster, but this monster was my own heart—growling and angry.

Toni, you are an obstinate girl, Ned noted.

I’d like that on my tombstone, I said a bit petulantly.

Before I could explain, a sharp knock hit my apartment door. I jumped out of bed, ran out to the living room and threw the door open.

Chapter Two

I was foolish. I thought it’d be Vincent. I don’t know why. He’d never knock.

Instead, Anita Ransom stood in my doorway. Mom, I said, trying to straighten my hair. Even if I had spent two hours tossing and turning, I should have looked perfect according to Anita Ransom’s codebook. After all, her mahogany curls were perfectly styled, and her suit was pressed and crisp.

I was seriously surprised when all she said was, You told me yesterday you were having trouble sleeping, crisply, normally, but I was shocked to hear a tone of concern. My mother…

I guess Helena’s attack on her had cracked some walls. Anita Ransom had always had some of concrete. When Helena and I were very young my parents had a problem with alcohol and drugs. They (or so Helena remembered) fought, drank, fought, smoked, and fought some more.

When I was four, Mom left me in the bath and I almost drowned. That made Mom go clean. My parents realized they were bad for each other, so they divorced. My mother took the self-improvement kick to a level of perfection. She said she wanted to make up for being such a rotten mother.

I think she wanted the new image to erase the old.

Ever since, Anita Ransom had been hard on everything she did—everything I did. She never wanted me to fall into the habit she kicked. Unfortunately, it had wiped out any kind of motherly care or concern.

Or so I had thought. Maybe… I was wrong. Maybe those walls had just contained her emotions inside so no one else knew.

I’m okay, I said bringing myself back to the situation at hand.

Well, I thought you’d say that. That’s why I allowed two full hours of tossing and turning before I came to make sure you accepted my help.

With that, she breezed in, carrying her purse. Once she got out of the foyer, Mom spotted Ned and nodded at him. Ned.

I swear the temperature dropped seven degrees with that one word. With my mother here I wouldn’t need air conditioning.

Anita. Ned nodded back.

And nothing else was said. She had accepted that Ned lived with me, but she didn’t like it. Little did she know that his presence protected me from the monsters of the world. Tirade Angels avoided Immortals’ homes. She only saw him as trying to return to the relationship she and he once had. I sighed. Those two had been on their way to marriage before Ned had to cover up his secret. Ned had started a fight—I don’t even know what about—and had moved to Moonwood. My mom hadn’t forgiven him.

I wished she would. I guess stubbornness ran in the family.

She turned her tiny body around and her back on Ned. Okay, now you haven’t been sleeping well.

I gave a wry grin. So, what? You’ve come to help me. Make me some hot milk. Maybe some tea. Or tell me a bedtime story like you used to. Total lies. She never did any of that.

Anita pursed her lips. No. I’ve come to help you with your main problem. You’ve been emoting too much recently. I want to make it stop. It’s time for you to start meditating.

What? I demanded putting my hands on my hips.

It couldn’t hurt, Mom said firmly. You’re going down a very bad path. My drinking. I never told you. It didn’t only bring bad stuff. It brought… demons. It’s hard. She took a few breaths, steadying herself.

I didn’t like the word demons.

I almost killed you. She wasn’t paying attention to anything I said. Her eyes were far away. Tortured by memories. That demon… so beautiful. So compelling. He wanted me to push your little head under the water. He wanted me to kill you. But he was the one who ended up dead, wasn’t he?

I gaped. Mom was talking about Tirade Angels. My drowning… it came back. Mom had been bathing me. Drunk. She had been so funny at first. I laughed so hard. But then the shadow. The shadow with wings.

Mom’s voice saying, No. I love my daughter. Toni is my world. Helena and Toni… Yes, just drains on me. Ruining my freedom. Little ingrates. Evils. I have to kill her. Drown her, yes, drown her.

Then her strong hands on my head. Water up my nose. A feeling of complete and utter helplessness. She let me go, though. When I had come up, Mom had been shoving a razor down a winged guy’s mouth, slicing him to ribbons.

He had poofed. Outside had exploded with light as stars fell.

Then quiet. Mom staring at me.

She had hugged me to her, crying. What did I do? My God, what did I almost do?

I came back to the present. Everything was explained. Mom had seen Tirade Angels. One had attacked her and somehow Mom had killed it. But she couldn’t bear to see them anymore, so she shut off. She forbade emotion. It had worked.

She reached out, yanked my wrist and pulled me into the living room. She sniffed a small bit as she noticed that the living room held some of Ned’s stuff, not fully moved in yet. And there was nothing left of Helena. Ned had helped remove the remnants of her.

Like I could forget my sister lived here once.

Anita sat down, shoving a suitcase out of the way with enough strength to fly it into the television. Lucky, it just hit the coffee table and fell to the floor. She angled her head, making shadows fall across the low-lit room.

"Before you start meditating, I need to address something. Toni, you should move back in with me. You’re still sixteen. And you need a complete change of scene. Away from this place where it happened."

It. Helena’s supposed suicide. Mom hid it well, but it had hurt. In her eyes, it had been Helena’s choice. I couldn’t fault her for wanting me out of here. On the surface, it was the worst situation. Me living on my own in the same apartment where my sister died. Even Ned’s presence couldn’t fix that. Not in Mom’s eyes.

But I couldn’t move back home. Ned was the reason I had been safe for the last few weeks. If I moved in with Mom, she’d never let Ned move in, and I’d lose his Immortal protection. And I might get another Tirade Angel’s attention on me. The only person who could be touched by them. Really touched.

That meant pain.

I opened my mouth to argue, but she pinned me with her gaze. No arguments.

I shook my head. I almost didn’t want to argue. But how could I take her up on her offer? Ned and I were a packaged set. If he was around, the Tirade Angels would stay away. That was it. How could I tell that to Mom?

Anita, Ned interjected. He sat down across from her in the recliner, perched on the edge. He righted his suitcase. I’m protecting her now. She’ll be okay.

Anita’s gaze turned into arrows and riddled Ned with them. You don’t get a vote.

He reached out and took her hand. His eyes spilled warmth. Mom didn’t pull away, I noticed.

I groaned inwardly. He was doing it again. To protect me, he was turning on his charm. If he could get her either so flummoxed by him or so angry, she’d do what she had before and leave, forgetting her goal. Ned knew, too, I was trapped by his side.

I turned on my heel. Ned may have been doing this for my own good, but I didn’t have to watch his lies. He was once a Tirade Angel. He still knew how to seduce. I couldn’t see my mom manipulated again.

I went to my room. I figured I’d either hear Mom screaming and leaving or Ned would come tell me she had listened to him. I wanted to cover up, bury myself in blankets. This secret of mine kept getting more complicated. I couldn’t tell Mom. She would be targeted.

I slammed my door open, but the sight in there broke my heart and fixed it at the same time. My wishes came true. There was Vincent!

Toni, we need to talk, he started, but I took a running leap into his arms and started kissing him, looping my arms behind his back to place them in between the warm pillows of his wings. I was so glad the air conditioner was fixed.

Vincent was just as warm and cozy as I remembered. I almost felt as if my arm was being reattached as I held him. Toni… Vincent gasped as he pulled away, but he’d need a crowbar to get me away from him. Please, you know…

It’s your own fault, you jerk, and I kissed him again, tracing from the corners of his lips to the center. He stopped resisting and kissed back, clutching me through my thin pajamas.

Finally, he managed to, when I paused for breath, say, I, um… He lost his train of thought as his eyes roved my face. Okay. Yeah. Focus, Vincent, he told himself. His words were silk down my spine. I didn’t come—that is to say…

I leaned in again, filling my nose with his unique scent. He was here. He was mine.

Vincent groaned. Oh—it’s about Helena!

That stopped me, and I leaned my head back to look in his beautiful eyes. I didn’t allow him to escape from my arms. Helena… did you find her?

He instead was distracted by my face. You haven’t been sleeping well… he noted, tracing the shadows under my eyes, finally caressing my jaw. How can a mortal woman be as beautiful as heaven? he asked.

How can an angel run away? I demanded, finally remembering that I was mad at him. Now, I stepped away, glaring. What is wrong with you?

He didn’t answer, because I heard my mom yell, Toni?

Oh crap. She was on her way. Vincent jumped into the air and started fluttering, his foot hanging close to my shoulder—the ceiling wasn’t too high.

Just in time!

The door opened, and Mom stepped in. I was very glad she couldn’t see Vincent. I didn’t need the third degree or another tirade about me having a boyfriend.

Are you okay? I heard you talking…

Just muttering.

It sounded like more than muttering. Ned entered as well. This room was getting crowded. Are you… He trailed off as he saw Vincent. It was funny, when Ned returned to my life, he and Vincent hadn’t gotten along. But after I almost died, there was a truce. It was gone in this instant.

Ned’s fists fell heavily at his side. His shoulders seemed to grow, menacing and angry.

Why don’t you… get your mother some tea, Toni, Ned suggested. Mom nodded. Her eyes were glowing a bit. Ned had done his thing. She was swooning. Ugh.

I wanted to say no way! But how was I supposed to explain that to my mom? She was feeling warm and cuddly thanks to Ned. I wondered what he had said to her.

Alright… just, Ned, don’t…

Don’t what? Ned asked innocently. I’ll just make your bed while you get your tea. Oh, and by the way, Toni, Anita has agreed to wait a few weeks for you to move home.

I hissed under my breath. I owed him. He had talked Mom into letting me stay. Great. I didn’t know what we’d do in a few weeks, but I guessed Ned had a plan for that time too.

Chapter Three

I had no choice but to gesture Mom into the kitchen. She watched me as I pulled the tea kettle down and put some water on. You like living with Ned, don’t you?

Ha. Not really. He was worse than Mom. But I couldn’t say that. Like old times. I kept my ear craned to what was happening in my room. There were angry murmurs, but no sound carried. Mom sat at the small round table next to the window in my kitchen.

It’s nice. He said… She played with her hands on top of my new red tablecloth. Ned had been busy decorating my home. You were safe.

That sounded odd, but I wasn’t going to argue with him. Yep. Safe and sound.

Anita pushed the cloth, bunching it and smoothing it. The red under her fingers spilling like blood across the table. Carl told me you jumped off the bell tower. He said he could have sworn.

I made a face. Carl. My boyfriend. Yeah. He had gone off to Paris a week ago, but he swore he’d see me when he got back. I kept living a double life, didn’t I?

Mistaken. Must have gotten sun in his eyes. I tried a grin, but it came out twisted.

She stared at me. I remembered all too well her anguished cries. Her return to the bottle. The loss of control. She had ignored me for a while