SHOWNOTES Question: I’d love to hear more about the possible distinction between standing in one’s own needs and then the problematic zone of asking or expecting a partner to change. Asking for change in certain areas seems reasonable and I use my own potential reaction to being asked to change as a measure: “Would I respond well to my partner asking me to change in this area?”But some areas seem tricky, such as Love Languages: “XYZ behaviour that is hard for you is actually what most supports me feeling loved and seen” etc.  Could you speak to this? Asking for what you need [6:00] Meeting your partner’s needs is win-win [9:00] If our primary partnership is unsafe [11:00] Knowing your partner’s needs before they ask [13:00]