“They were there to remind me who I was in the world, and it hurt too much on the inside, being hurt on the outside didn’t matter as much.” Producer: Whit Missildine, Andrew Waits Episode Summary: A man’s rage grows after growing up with racism and abuse, leading to transformative encounters with brutality, violence and ultimately, inner strength. Social Media: Instagram: @actuallyhappeningWebsite: www.thisisactuallyhappening.com Andrew Waits: http://andrdewwaits.com/ Support the Show: Support The Show on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/happening Engage with the Community: Join the This Is Actually Happening Discussion Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/201783687561039/ Shop at the Store: The This Is Actually Happening online store is now officially open. Follow this link www.actuallyhappeningstore.com to access branded t-shirts, posters, stickers and more from the shop.  Content/Trigger Warnings: racism, racially charged language, violence, police brutality, explicit language Intro Music: "Illabye" – TipperMusic Bed: “Cylinder Four/Cylinder Five” – Chris Zabriskie ServicesIf you or someone you know is struggling with the effects of trauma or mental illness, please refer to the following resources.National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 National Alliance on Mental Illness: 1-800-950-6264National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)Crisis Text Line: Within the US, text HOME to 741741See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.