“It’s like trying to go into like a dark cave with a rope attached to you so that you can find your way back and then losing that the end of the rope.” Producer: Whit Missildine Episode Summary: Following a tumultuous upbringing, a woman begins confronting the complexities of her identity and self-destructive tendencies, when all of a sudden, devastating bouts of Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder begin to consume her life. Social Media:Instagram: @actuallyhappeningThis Is Actually Happening Discussion Group on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/201783687561039/  Website: www.thisisactuallyhappening.com Content/Trigger Warnings: suicidal ideation, domestic abuse, self-harm, mental illness, PMDD, explicit languageWondery Plus: All episodes of the show prior to episode #130 are now part of the Wondery Plus premium service. To access the full catalog of episodes, and get all episodes ad free, sign up for Wondery Plus at https://wondery.com/plusSupport the Show: Support The Show on Patreon https://www.patreon.com/happening Shop at the Store: The This Is Actually Happening online store is now officially open. Follow this link: https://www.thisisactuallyhappening.com/shop to access branded t-shirts, posters, stickers and more from the shop.  Intro Music: "Illabye" – TipperMusic Bed: “Cylinder Four/Five” – Chris Zabriskie ServicesIf you or someone you know is struggling with the effects of trauma or mental illness, please refer to the following resources. National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 National Alliance on Mental Illness: 1-800-950-6264National Sexual Assault Hotline (RAINN): 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)Crisis Text Line: Within the US, text HOME to 741741See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.