It’s the little things that hit hardest. The big moments when I expect to be emotional have generally felt unremarkable; I seem to have experienced them with relative ease. The surprises come when I’m taking a walk, talking about a silly childhood memory, or seeing an old friend. Above all, I’ve learned that my emotions are often hidden - from myself as well as from others - and then I think that I’m done having feelings. But I repeatedly learn that they lie barely below the surface, ready to emerge when I least expect them. This is not typical episode. Today I'm going to talk about my dad, and what life has been like since he died of pancreatic cancer three and a half weeks ago. I hope that it's meaningful for you, just as it was for me. Check out the Orthodox Conundrum Commentary on Substack and get your free subscription by going to https://scottkahn.substack.com/. To read Scott's reflections on his father's life, click here.  Please listen to and share this podcast, and let us know what you think on the Orthodox Conundrum Discussion Group on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/groups/432020081498108). Thanks to all of our Patreon subscribers, who have access to bonus JCH podcasts, merch, and more - we appreciate your help, and hope you really enjoy the extras! Visit the JCH Patreon site at https://www.patreon.com/jewishcoffeehouse. Check out https://jewishcoffeehouse.com/ for the Orthodox Conundrum and other great podcasts, and remember to subscribe to them on your favorite podcast provider. Also visit https://www.jchpodcasts.com/ to learn all about creating your own podcast. Music: "Happy Rock" by bensound.com